neuro.me.uk

Update 2009-12-13 17:54: updated Facebook group URL, charity total
Update 2009-12-13 21:49: original Facebook group is back!
Update 2009-12-14 08:00: It’s Monday! BUY IT NOW!
Update 2009-12-15 13:00: Keep buying! A one day push isn’t enough, it needs to be sustained throughout the week! We’re currently up 10% over X Factor Joe!
Update 2009-12-20 00:10: Well, if the iTunes top 10 is anything to go by, we’re home!

So it’s The X Factor finale tonight, not that I could really care much. I’ve only watched it when the regional auditions are on, which means I only watch it for the first four weeks or so, but they changed the format to have the auditions in front of an audience, Britain’s Got Talent-stylee. This didn’t sit well for me, so I ended up not watching at all; no great loss to my media consumption whatsoever.

Concurrent with all this X Factor bollocks, and the usual notion that the winner will go on to produce a single worthy of making enough sales to reach No. 1 of the charts for Christmas, there’s a concerted online effort by over 600,000 Facebook members to kibosh this trend — they’re urging people to buy Rage Against the Machine’s 1993 track “Killing in the Name” so that it’ll go to No. 1. You may have heard about this over the last couple of days. Simon Cowell thinks the campaign is “stupid”, “cynical” and will “spoil the party for these three” [the X Factor finalists]. I think it’s a fantastic idea, which pushes buying power back towards the consumers, and away from the moguls who insist on showering us with manufactured pop fluff. I’m not saying there’s no place for pop fluff, but perhaps The X Factor would be better placed to promote jobbing musicians with real talent, not just at singing other people’s compositions, but at actually writing, creating and performing their own, original and passionate music. Hearing another over-produced piece of pap churned out by a dozen songwriters and emitted by the next bland Z-list wannabe is not my idea of promoting musical talent in this country. Honestly, Leona Lewis aside, can anyone point me to the classic music that past winners are still putting out?

And bear in mind that this campaign wasn’t created by some noo-meeja Nathan Barley-style wankers, or some record company execs looking to make a quick buck at Simon Cowell’s expense (Rage are signed to Epic, who are owned by Sony BMG, who employ Cowell, so Sony only stand to benefit either way here); it was created by two people on Facebook — Tracy and Jon Morter — who had decided that enough was enough. At the moment, nearly three quarters of a million people agree. If you’re on Facebook, you should join in the fun.

Anyway, the campaign: it’s ridiculously simple. Put Rage Against the Machine’s “Killing in the Name” at Number One in the Christmas chart by buying it between this Monday (14th) and Saturday (19th). Some places are saying do it tomorrow (Sunday the 13th), but it’s unclear whether or not sales tomorrow will count towards the Christmas Top 40 data, so better safe than sorry — do it sometime between Monday and Saturday. And yes, downloads absolutely count. Even if you already own the single or the 1993 self-titled album, buy it again. It won’t cost much.

You can buy it from these music outlets:

• 7 Digital Media in MP3 format for 99p
• Amazon UK in MP3 format for 79p (see note below)
• HMV in MP3 format for 79p
• iTunes in AAC (M4A) format for 99p
• Napster (I’m not a subscriber, so I have no details)
• Play Digital in MP3 format for 70p
• Tesco Entertainment in MP3 format for 67p
• WE7 in MP3 format for £1.07p

… or just rock into a record store and see if they have any copies of the single! Note that some of these links link to the album; just buy the individual track. Also, there’s a 29p MP3 version on Amazon — do not buy this. Only sales over 40p qualify for chart eligibility.

Once you’ve done that, the Facebook group is encouraging those of us participating in this stunt to donate a little something to the charity Shelter, which works to improve the lives of homeless and badly housed people. If you’re a taxpayer, an additional 20% of whatever you donate will be added on. At time of writing, they’re over the £12,000 £16,000 mark. That’s just phenomenal.

So give what you can to Shelter (I donated a tenner), and spend less than a quid pissing off Simon Cowell. It’s a win-win situation for everyone.

The first rule of Drink Camp is: you do not talk about Drink Camp.

The second rule of Drink Camp is: you do not talk about Drink Camp.

Third rule: If someone says “shots!”, orders a martini, or drinks Fosters, the drink is over.

Fourth rule: Only one glass to a drink.

Fifth rule: One drink at a time, fellas.

Sixth rule: No cocktail umbrellas, no coasters.

Seventh rule: Drinks will go on as long as they have to.

And the eighth and final rule: If this is your first night at Drink Camp, you have to drink.

His name, was Jack Daniels.

Last year, I thought “how cool would it be to have a Talk Like Yoda Day, you know, like Talk Like a Pirate Day?” I wasn’t the first to have the idea — and I certainly won’t be the last — but I’ve finally managed to throw content onto talklikeyoda.com in time for the proposed Day on the 21st of May (the 1980 US release date of Empire).

I should have done it much, much sooner, but you know, I suck et cetera. Anyway, enjoy.

UpdateDigg this, you will.

My ADSL connection is currently tres latent due to some Cisco badness on BT’s part. If you’re trying to call me on Skype or my VoIP number, it’ll either sound like I’m the Moon, or it won’t connect. You may also find my site a tad slow too until it’s sorted out.

Still, in other news, I’ve found out a great way to get a cheap flatscreen TV that looks like this …

… the only problem is, that to install it, you have to do this …

Cheers to Derek for that!

Tomorrow is, as always, Talk Like a Pirate Day. It’s a day when everyone should talk like a pirate. There’s no real reason behind it, other than it’s fun.

However, I’d like to nominate May 21st as Talk Like Yoda Day. Why May 21st? It’s the date in 1980 when The Empire Strikes Back — and thus Yoda — was unleashed onto an unsuspecting world. Never the same, grammar would be.

And talk like Yoda, you could too. Easy, it is. Talking backwards, it is not, but more difficult, it is. Transpose your sentence structure, you must. Sound strange, do I? The way of the Force, this is. Wearing the costume of Yoda, optional, it is.

Closer to the time, remind you all of this day, I will! Control, control, you must learn control!

Well, looks like one of ThinkGeek’s excellent 2003 April Fools — the George Foreman USB iGrill — is still wreaking havoc amongst the gadget blogging community. Not only did Wired’s Gear Factor (cached copy) pick up this from mobilemag.com (cached copy) as though new — Wired, newsflash, it’s over three years old — before deleting the article — Wired, breaking news, Google remembers all — but numerous other gadget sites carried the same thing as though real, including Gadgetspy (cached copy). Someone even tried to digg the story.

Bwahahaha.

Sorry, it wasn’t Natalie Portman being photographed topless on a beach by paparazzi, or being cast in V for Vendetta, or shaving her head, but this segment from a recent Saturday Night Live which makes me think “hey, Natalie Portman, not a kid anymore” …

Cheers to NBC for letting a kosher version finally become available.

I usually only listen to blonde jokes told by blonde women — knowing self-deprecation is the best humour — but this has to be the best blonde joke ever told. Seriously!

UUUHHHGGG-rrrrRRR!: Genius.